The heart may want it, but at times we should pay more attention to our brains. Dating is a learning curve.. Finding Mr. Right does not come easy for everyone
A man can be sweet, good-looking, and wealthy, but he may still have some fatal flaw that is a total deal breaker. It may not even present itself right away, but in time, it will emerge. And let me give you a little piece of advice: you cannot change him. Don’t even try.
Remember this will lead to marriage which is a lifetime commitment you all know. If they have some major defect you can’t live with – walk away.
- Mama’s Boy.
At first he’ll be charming and treat you like a princess. You’ll soon find out however that you are not the only woman in his life.
Their mother/son bond borders on unhealthy. They phone each other daily. She still cooks his dinners, does his laundry, and makes sure he’s visited by the “Money Fairy” from time to time.
He goes to her for advice on all things. It’s the mother to make a final decision in all matters happening in her son’s life including deciding on who he should date. She still refers to him by his childhood nickname – Buju Buju, Teddy bear, or whatever other idiotic name it might be that makes you barf in your mouth a little.
You will forever be compared to her, will never quite live up, and will always come second.
- Mr. Social Media.
This is the guy whose smartphone is another addiction. It is never out of reach. It’s either in his pocket or on the table next to him.
He suffers from serious FOMO (fear of missing out) and cannot go five minutes without looking at it. In fact, when you’re on a date, his phone makes you feel like a third wheel.
Whether he’s updating his Instagram, checking soccer scores, WhatsApp with friends, making a TikTok, or catching up on his X (Twitter), you will forever be competing with his phone time.
- My-Kids-Are-My-Life Guy.
I think it goes with a saying that “those of us with children” place them very highly on our priority lists.
However, My-Kids-Are-My-Life Guy will do nothing without his little dears. He doesn’t believe in babysitters. He thinks if you have someone else care for your children, you may as well not have had them in the first place.
Therefore, You’ll get no quality time and you will never be a priority, your dates with this type of guy will consist of trips to the zoo with his children, children’s birthday parties, Or even NO dates at all. He will choose the kids over you.
- Mr. Passive Aggressive.
He may seem nice at first, and he’ll still have his moments, but dating a passive-aggressive will not go well.
He doesn’t like confrontation, therefore won’t express himself when he has an opinion or is angry or upset. If you’re lucky, he’ll write you a note.
If he doesn’t give any opinion, he can blame you for everything that doesn’t work out. And he won’t bring it up right away, he’ll hold onto that little grudge to use as punishment later.
This type of man to avoid will always be the victim, so you’ll never win an argument with him. When he does finally express himself, it’s like a volcano eruption.
- The Idler/Lazybones
This type of man goes nowhere fast.
He probably has big dreams but is a notorious non-finisher of things, – university, the startup of a business, that book he’s writing, the chicken project, etc. More than likely he’s unemployed, a good-for-nothing, and may live with friends or at his parent’s house
Instead of looking for gainful employment, he’s smoking weed, playing video games, and endlessly watching TikTok or YouTube videos. He never wants to go out and doesn’t have the money to do so if he did. He is the epitome of “arrested development.”
- Mr. Madonna/Whore Complex.
The term madonna-whore complex was devised by Sigmund Freud and is the distinction men draw between the women they desire and the women they respect – and the two are mutually exclusive.
In this type of man’s eyes, you are either virtuous or you are a slut.
Essentially, this guy will have sex with you, but he will never marry you.
Because even though he wanted to, and even if he’s a man-whore, once you agree to knock boots with him, he will see you as a prostitute.
- Mr. Judgypants.
This guy is like a vampire. His constant complaints, criticism and judgments will drain you. He is a people watcher, constantly waiting for someone to make a mistake.
It doesn’t matter what it is, they could be wearing white pants after Labor Day, eating salad with their dinner fork, or failing to respond to his whatsApp message.
This type of guy to avoid needs to find something on which to base his entire negative opinion.
It will only be a matter of time before he labels you based on one of your little faults. “I didn’t know you had a tattoo. You must be a wild one.” “That type of job, am sure you will not cook food for me.”
It could be something to that effect, or it could be increasingly ruder. Don’t wait to find out, my dear RUN!!!!!!
- Mr. Arrogant.
He’s smart, funny, good looking, and seems extremely confident. Arrogance is often mistaken for confidence. In fact, a confident man would not do or think the things Mr. Arrogant does.
He thinks he’s better than you.
In fact, he’s better than everyone. His best friend is the guy in the mirror. He has no true friends, just superficial colleagues. He’s a know-it-all that demeans people to their faces and makes jokes at their expense. He also has to make up every story you tell because, well, he’s better than you.
- 9. The Control Freak.
The control freak man may be a career professional who seems like he’s got it all together. His house is probably spotless.
However, won’t take too long before his true colors bleed through the smokescreen.
He will probably clean up after you, maybe sighing or muttering under his breath as he does. If you move something, he will move it back to its “proper” place.
He keeps a routine and doesn’t like monkey wrenches thrown in, so no spontaneous dates or birthday surprise,
He’s probably the jealous type, so he wants to know where you are and what you’re doing at all times.
He wants access to your text messages, email and social media accounts.
He will criticize your for your imperfections and twists. He is moody, *especially* when he feels he’s not in control.
- The Workaholic.
His tailored power suit may be the first thing you notice about the workaholic and of course the well-polished good looks.
But, similar to a social media man you will be in a constant three-way – with his phone. And you can forget about ever making plans in advance. They will either be forgotten or rescheduled.
When he actually does have a free night the last thing this type of man will want to do is go out. He’s going to need to be productive in some other way. He’ll want to visit the village, work on some other project he’s been wanting the time to do.
His drive to was probably instilled at a young age by parents who wanted perfection.
At home, he will either be a control freak or at the complete other end of the spectrum, not wanting to make a single decision because that’s what he does all day.
More than likely, all your conversations will be about his work.
- Eternal Bachelor.
He’ll probably have you thinking, how can this guy be unattached?
He’s cute, fun, smart, personality plus. He doesn’t have kids. The next thing you should ask yourself is, why is this type of man single? He’ll be crazy for you too – at first, no doubt about it.
Your relationship with the eternal bachelor will be electric and adventurous. You’ll go listen to live music, he’ll cook for you. He’ll pay for everything. He has cool hobbies.
You may even hear the words, “I love you” come out of his mouth. You’ll seriously start thinking he’s the one.
Hold that thought.
Just when things are going great, he starts having doubts.
He starts remembering why he’s single. He likes the time to work on his cool hobbies, meets the guys. He’s realizing he’s spending money on you and less on his hobbies.
All of a sudden you have stuff at his house, shampoo, a toothbrush, a few of your clothes. You’re around more than you’re not and he feels like he can’t breathe. And then he’s not that into you anymore and breaks up with you.
But hey, look, these type of men to avoid do not comprise every guy on the face of the planet.
There are some out there who are normal and loveable…ish. But keep this in mind; nobody is perfect.
Don’t mistake these destructive personality traits for twists with which you could live.
This is my mantra when it comes to dating: Life is short. Don’t waste it with people who make you miserable.
So… if you come across one of these, it’s time to move on. Girlfriend just RUN and don’t look back.
